I lay in bed and stared at my ceiling without emotion.
I was through with emotions. Too many for one afternoon. I was trapped in myself.
All day I sat on the rod iron swing on the side of my duplex and I waited. I watched the cars speed by and waited. I felt the cold trickle of my tears on my rose petal cheeks and I waited. I stared at my novel, flipping pages now and then to give the illusion of occupation, and waited.
...
"What do I get if I win?" The mystery that only a young innocent can have sprang into my eyes and curved my lips into a sly smile. I knew what I wanted, I just had to toss the bait in his path so that he tripped over i
I stared blankly at the closed coffin and tried to remember what he looked like before he died. He'd been the only boy I'd ever loved and now he wasn't coming back to me.
"I deserve this. This is my punishment." I thought in my head as the whining funeral music played behind the priest and his sobbing parents.
I couldn't call what we had a whirlwind romance because it took too long to start. He was my first everything. My first boyfriend, kiss, make-out, and lover. I guess you never really get over that.
I didn't want to anyway. I liked holding onto the past. It was all I had anymore.
As I sat in the back of the church, my eyes still dry,
My eyes reflect back at me
Watching me as I watch them
The looking glass of life
Keeps me locked at one point
In time
The world shifts and changes
But I miss out
I'm too busy mourning
Staring, coping, sighing
In time
In time I'll learn
In time I'll take part
But not yet
Not until
I can't go back
Wake up just to stare at the ceiling
Don't move, don't breath, don't speak
Good morning sleepy head
Feel the sun kiss your cheek
Slowly get dressed and ready
To face another day
To live another moment
To have another say
Trip down the stairs
Throw your head back and sigh
Things get better and things get worse
All you have to do is try.
Holding onto a life that's gone
My soul cries out on and on
My body lays upon the ground
My tears no longer make a sound
He took my life but not my soul
My breath slipped out, the sounding toll
Above the earth I scream with fright
I watch him blend into the night
My death wasn't his first murder
I was a joy, a pleasure
He stole away to find his sight
Before the day took hold of night
La Persistencia de la Memoria by AsraiWings, literature
Literature
La Persistencia de la Memoria
The edge of consciousness
The realm of dreams
Memories distorted
Or so it seems
Chocolate cliffs tower
As clocks of ooze melt
Symbols of his memories
Reveal how he truly felt
Simplistic designs
Of comlicated matter
Twisted in paint
A subject for chatter
His subconcious desires
Laid out in hues
Confuses our conscious
Mixing out views
A sultry orange blaze
Races across the horizon
Ensnaring wisps of clouds
Lighting them a morbid pink
The canary sphere
Darkens into gold
Rays of flame
Spring into dance
The day is singing
Itself into completion
Rich colors soon retreat
Inviting shadows fall
Out of place
In bustle, hustle
Taxis and lights
Majesty and wonder
In a city of busy
A cathedral breaks pattern
Neon light reflects
Green on gothic arches
Eerie glowing
Inside the noise drowns
A sea of silence
A warm glow of candle light
Golden altar toward the front
Poinsettas glitter between gaps
A priest breaks bread
It's Christmas eve
A quiet world
In the loud
Sitting on the edge of the roof
Swinging my dangling feet
Wondering what life will bring
Young mind not missing a beat
I have everything and none
I hold my life in my hand
But its gently slipping out
Cracks in my fingers, like sand
I'm never enough; Not quite up to snuff
I'm never right; The darkness in the light
They taunt and they tease as I try to please
Because he deserves more than me at his core
For I am too rash, bold, loud, and brash
I'll love his heart; The emotional part
I don't know why they point and they sigh
At the love of their friend, who'll love him till the end
They want him content and so they relent
Over a girl who's in love with their gift from above
I make him smile for the first in a while
They make him cry but it's my lie that's a lie
I slipped out of your life
As tears slipped down glass
Shrunk away into shadows
Hidden there by you
You pushed me til I slipped
You ripped me from my heart
Before you held my life
And crushed it in your palm
Earth fills my eyes
My nose, my mouth
I can't scream or cry
I just lie still
I feel people walking
Running and dancing
Over my body
As I sleep in the ground
No one notices
My fingers poke through
To wave at the sunlight
Before it sleeps too
I want you there
But you left me
Standing alone
In cold night air
I see your face
In my dreams now
I cannot wait
To ask you how
How you left me
Why you lied too
What is it babe?
Too much for you?
I gave you heart
Soul, anything
You turned away
Lost everything
If I could pick a perfect moment
To end my crappy life
I'd crawl away and hide my tears
Rather than heal my strife
I'd grab the blade
And hold it close
My heart beating against it
All the way to my toes
My tears would fall
Onto the handle,
Slipping away into the night
Like an old fashioned candle
Then it would drop
And scatter away
Leaving me alive
To see another day
The dark and foreboding
Mystical seductive creature
Revels in her misery
And casts nets out for more
The demon in my thoughts
The flash behind my eyes
Wings of scaled darkness
Heart of black hopes
Eyes of passionate pleasures
The shrouded angel reins
The dying heros plight
Her memory's a part
Of his quickly failing heart
On enemy lands he should fight
Of the atheistic Sartre
A silent silver dart
Ends his future sight
Her eyes no longer see
The kind and loving man
Her heart will never be
Unlocked without his key
Though he tried but no longer can
Stand by my side, with me
It beats softly in your hand
Loving the way you hold it
Snuggling close to your own
The one you wouldn't give up
One day you'll trade me
Your heart for mine
We'll hold each other's
Life in our hands
I'll let you win this time
You can keep mine
But one day please promise
That you'll play fair too
Current Residence: Yukon, Oklahoma MP3 player of choice: Dell DJ Favourite cartoon character: Ariel, Calvin Personal Quote: "Childhood is short. Maturity is forever." ~Calvin and Hobbes